Long time... no speak...

Old Friends

As I stepped off the stoop of my mom’s house, I looked down the block and saw you leaning against your car.  I was on my way out but I headed over to where you were and asked, “what’s good?” to which you replied, “Same ol’ s**t”.  You asked the same question and I responded quickly with “Chillin… workin, ya know.”  When we were kids, our interactions lasted for hours, but now our relationship is reduced to a two-minute exchange.

Even the times when we had more time to talk, our conversations still felt empty. You used to be one of my closest friends but that day might as well have been the first that we’ve ever met.  At some point our lives took different paths and we became different people.  I can’t relate to your time in jail and you can’t relate to mine in college.  I’ve never been shot at and you’ve never bought a stock.  We may find common ground with sports and music but we rely on both as a crutch to keep things interesting.

When all else fails, we fall back on the “remember when’s” knowing that we’ve talked about these same memories over and over and that a new one hasn’t been created in years.  I left, you’re still there – we live in two completely different worlds.

Deep down you probably think that I’ve changed and deep down I lack sympathy for your current struggles.  Our words don’t say it but our body language clearly passes judgment.  But what you don’t know is that I don’t think that I’m better than you.  I simply had opportunities that you didn’t.  It tears me apart knowing that we can’t hang like we used to and that I have to turn my back on you… but you made certain choices and I can’t risk my future living in the world that you’ve created for yourself.

The time comes when we both realize that we’ve worn out each other’s welcome.  A thick layer of nostalgia covers up the fact that we no longer know each other and since we have no desire to bridge the gap, we settle on simply being “cool”.  Everytime I say “peace” and slap your hand, I never know for sure if it’s the last time that we’ll say good-bye.  It’s ironic that the same Nas lyrics we once listened to as kids, now define us:

“… a thug changes, and love changes, and best friends become strangers.”